


A Lone Wolf

by Niki



Series: Pack Dynamics [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, M/M, Mental Health Issues, finding pack, lycanthropy as disability
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-11-07 11:46:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11058282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niki/pseuds/Niki
Summary: "Beforewas pack and Steve and family, safety and warmth and purpose.Nowis loneliness and pain and hunger and cold, andsoonis when he'll reach the source of that incredible scent reminding him of home."





	A Lone Wolf

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Amonae](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amonae/gifts).



> Thank you for giving me a chance to write a werewolf AU!

The wolf doesn't know how long he's been running. There is not much room for time sense in his mind, just _before_ , _now_ , and _soon_. _Before_ was pack and Steve and family, safety and warmth and purpose. _Now_ is loneliness and pain and hunger and cold, and _soon_ is when he'll reach his target. 

It feels like _now_ has been bad forever. Memories of warmth and pack are fading, but he can still remember Steve. Steve, who was too small as a human and too large as a wolf, but at least his paw form matched the size of his spirit. 

Losing him, and everything that followed that, made it too hard to stay in human form, with time sense, with history, with tears and pain and loss. Easier to take to paw, to run alone. As unnatural as a lonely wolf is, as vulnerable, it is still better. It is better to only know before and now, instead of all those years and decades that separate him from his last true pack.

The wolf and the man are not separate, not as such, both share a soul, the personality, the brain, which ever you want to call it, but their physiology on its own brings its differences. The wolf and the man don't always react the same way to situations nor do they wish for the same things on a larger scale.

Still, all that said... it's easier to be the wolf. It's easier to live by his instincts and do without the long term planning of the human. The wolf aches for the loss but is more pragmatic about it, especially alone they – he – needs to concentrate on the immediate needs first. Food, shelter, food, shelter, mating. 

The wolf longs for a pack but the fear of loss from the human side is stronger. The natural wolves would never accept a shifter as a full member, and he is not ready for others of his kind... not after Hydra... not after... 

True wolves only change form by the moon, but Hydra broke him. They needed only the wolf because the wolf is easier to control, so they changed him until he could change at will – at their will. 

He ran, but he is still broken, and the human side hasn't felt this strong in ages.

But now... The scent is new. It makes the human-side of Bucky perk up from within the wolf-mind, and it drives the wolf frantic. It smells like home, like pack, like family and Bucky hasn't scented the like in too long. 

Bucky is the wolf and the wolf is Bucky, but he was born human, so it always felt more... more like _him_ to be on two legs. So to spend so long – years, now, or is it decades? – as the animal makes it feel like he's been sleeping, dreaming wolf dreams of sounds and shapes and scents. 

But now the both sides of him seem to be in accord: they need to reach the source of the alluring scent. They need to go home. Or is it just the wolf instinct, strong enough to feel by the human side too? 

Because it smells almost like... but no, Steve is dead. Steve was pack and Steve is gone. But this...

He runs. 

He runs longer and farther than he should have been able to smell.

 

It's a man. Dark hair, brown eyes, a little shorter than average, says the human side. Smells like pack, feels warm, says the wolf side. 

He wants to go nuzzle, but Bucky forces himself to change forms, because even deep within the wolf mind he knows he needs human vocal chords for this.

”Show yourself,” the man says, frowning into the shadows, and Bucky does.

He's still on paws when he steps into the light but by the third step the change has come upon him, but it's been too long – he falters on two feet, blinks against the sudden burst of color and light, even as the dulled senses of smell and hearing make him feel like he's submerged under water. 

He would fall, but he he is caught.

”Holy shit, are you alright?” 

 

His name is Tony. He talks so fast Bucky has a hard time keeping up, head still half wolf even on two feet. But he is kind, if brusque, talking of things Bucky doesn't know, but he has food, and his den is huge (a house, a mansion, a rich person place), and he opens the door to Bucky even after he saw his both forms.

Where is this trust coming from? Why is Bucky following him in when he hasn't trusted a human for so long? Is the call of the scent for the wolf strong enough to drown out the good sense of the man? 

And why is this man trusting a monster that appeared on his doorstep?

But he does, and Bucky follows him in, because which ever side of him is making the decisions, it's drowning out all the rest.

Tony offers Bucky clothes, and only then does he recognise his own nudity now that he's shed his fur form. 

“Sorry,” he says, and his voice is rusty, quiet, but Tony shoots him a quick smile, and leaves the shirt, the pants, soft, worn material, too small, but enough to cover his most vulnerable parts. 

Tony doesn't ask questions, not the kind he seems to expect answers for anyway. He seems to think Bucky came to him for aid, and... maybe he did?

He also calls Bucky by his name which should be odd, shouldn't it? He cannot know it, Bucky hasn't told him that, has he?

He smells... odd. He doesn't smell like other humans but is that just because he smells like Bucky's? Or is he more than just a man too?

“How... name?” he gets out, in the middle of something else Tony was talking about but he rolls with that too, as he has with everything so far.

“Yours? James Buchanan 'Bucky' Barnes? Hate to say it, buddy, but you're kind of famous. All of those who ran with Capwolf are.”

“Captain America...” Bucky whispers. “Steve.” The wolf howls with loss in his mind, and there, at least, he can be sure the both sides are in accord.

“They still haven't found his body, I'm sorry to say. I kept dad's projects running despite everything.”

“How long...?”

“Have you been furry all this time? You don't look a day over 25. It's been speculated that lycanthropy can extend life because the wolf-form doesn't age as fast but there hasn't been that much data and...”

Everything looks different to Bucky's human eyes now that he's taking the time to look around. The food, the kitchen, everything shiny and big. With Hydra, he hadn't paid that much attention when they let the wolf out but this...

“It's been... quite a long time,” Tony is saying, and he sounds apologetic. “Like decades long. It's two-thousand...”

That's as far as he gets naming the year before blood rushes inside Bucky's head, blocking his ears and making him sway. 2000. _2000_. A new millennium. 

“Hey whoa, whoa, whoa, you okay, fuzball?”

Again Tony would come to his rescue but Bucky catches himself in time. Still...

“I think I need to sit down.”

 

Bucky knows he is more wolf than man, still. He scents instead of looking, he concentrates way too much of his attention to food and mate... Tony. His name is Tony, and he is barely a friend, much less pack. 

And yet... Tony gives him a home, lets him stay, without a question. Well, there are questions, but they are easy to field by shrugs, and Tony is willing to let them go with that. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, the time sense of the wolf. Anyway, if you want to shift, there's plenty of ground for it.”

Tony's house is very well situated for a wolf, which Bucky doesn't even think about until the moon is full once more. For him, the song is quiet – he can feel it in his blood, but it doesn't force a change. It can be useful to be broken, too. 

But Tony answers its call, and the first time Bucky sees his paw form... he's beautiful as a man but he's breath-taking as a wolf. His fur is red, with almost golden highlights when the light catches them right, smaller than him, but still bigger than natural wolves. 

Playful, reminding Bucky of Before, and he laughs when the wolf nips at his arm, tugging him along, inviting him to play – and where Bucky didn't answer to the call of the moon, he does answer to this, and allows the change to take over for the first time since he found Tony.

The scent is even stronger now – pack, mate, home – but the wolf is ready to wait, he knows he needs to win any potential mate over, and playing together is the best way to get to know someone. So they chase each other into the woods, hunt small prey and share the meat, lick the blood off each others muzzles, and sleep, sated, until the sun of the second day forces Tony to change back. 

“Ow, ow, ow, what did we do? I need a shower. And coffee! Oh my god, so much coffee. Coming, Buckaroo paws?”

Bucky jogs along as the wolf because Tony doesn't seem to mind, just chatters along like he would to the man, and doesn't seem too concerned over his own nudity. 

The wolf only sees the form of the muscles, notes the strength inherent in them. Maybe it's a good think he doesn't let his human side surface because then he might not let Tony shower alone.

Maybe the wolf and the human are together in this, after all.

“You don't... smell like wolf,” he says after Tony has rejoined him, and they're sharing coffee and human breakfast. 

“Ah. Well... My change wasn't... it wasn't normal. I was... injured, pretty badly...”

The sound out of Bucky's mouth resembles a whine more than a human voice, distress evident, and Tony pauses to smile. “I'm fine now. Well, mostly. I'm just saying that... the change was forced. And... it didn't take, not as well as it should have. So I'm a little... unstable.”

Bucky is sniffing the air now, wondering if he should change to gain access to keener senses. 

“But you change with the moon,” he says, to remind himself that human form has its advantages too. 

“I do now. But you don't,” Tony says, and it could be casual, or it could be pointed, but it's the first time Tony has brought it up and Bucky has lived in his den for almost a month.

“I am a little... unstable too,” he confesses.

The smile he gets in return is bright, accepting, welcoming. It looks like home, like pack. 

And that is when Bucky realises he is actually, humanly, in love with Tony, even without wolfy instincts.

Maybe he was all along... maybe that's what the wolfy instincts were _about_. 

Huh. Love at first sniff. 

He smiles back.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you feel like I did justice to your prompt even though I stress some parts of it, and gloss over others. And I guess this is technically pre-slash, which I hope you don't horribly mind, but this is where the story ended. I tried to get to the mating part, but that required huge jumps in time and I felt they deserved to have those stories told as well... So this is now part one of a series, as I couldn't fit all my ideas into a coherent whole!


End file.
